Episode #123: From Addict to Judge

From Addict to Judge with Mary Beth O’Connor

Mary Beth O’Connor’s life is a gripping redemption story of addiction recovery and resilience. From surviving childhood abuse, sexual assault, and decades of methamphetamine addiction to achieving 30 years of sobriety as a federal court judge, her journey inspires women over 50 to find purpose and passion.

 In this Aging with Purpose and Passion podcast episode, O’Connor shares with Beverley Glazer the raw mechanics of transformation—how trauma fueled her dependency, starting with alcohol at 12 and escalating to injecting meth by 17. Despite addiction, she attended Berkeley, only to watch her potential fade. Recovery wasn’t a single rock-bottom moment but a gradual awakening at 32. She entered rehab doubting sobriety was possible, offering hope to anyone hesitant to start. O’Connor’s key insight? Address addiction andtrauma together—her PTSD proved tougher than quitting drugs. 

From law school at 39 to judge at 53, her story, detailed in Junkie to Judge, proves it’s never too late to rebuild. Ready to ignite your next chapter? Tune in to discover how small steps can unlock your unstoppable potential with Aging with Purpose and Passion—the weekly podcast inspiring women over 50 to embrace bold shifts, redefine themselves, and craft a vibrant, fulfilling life.

Key Takeaways from From Addict to Judge with Mary Beth O’Connor

Trauma and Its Impact on Substance Abuse: 

Mary Beth’s childhood trauma, marked by neglect, violence, and sexual abuse, set the stage for her struggles with addiction. Growing up without a supportive, connected mother, she was left to fend for herself emotionally. When her stepfather became abusive, it intensified the stress and isolation she felt, ultimately leading her to substances as a form of self-soothing. Drugs, especially alcohol at first, provided temporary relief from the emotional pain, anxiety, and tension of her circumstances. This pattern of using substances to escape became a way for her to cope with trauma and neglect, making it a common pathway to addiction for many.

Escalation of Drug Use:

Mary Beth’s addiction rapidly escalated from alcohol to a variety of substances, including marijuana, acid, pills, and eventually methamphetamine. By the time she was 17, she was injecting meth regularly. Despite this, she managed to attend college, which she saw as her escape and a place where she was valued. However, as her drug use worsened, especially after a violent relationship in college, her academic and personal life began to unravel. This shift shows the increasing grip of addiction and how even those who appear to be succeeding academically or professionally can struggle behind the scenes.

The Downward Spiral of Addiction:

Mary Beth’s life during her active addiction was marked by a relentless downward spiral. Her drug use severely impacted her ability to hold jobs, maintain relationships, or make progress in life. As the addiction deepened, she found herself isolated, unable to keep a steady job, and spiraling further into despair. Despite her academic achievements, including a degree from Berkeley, she struggled with maintaining stability, showing how addiction can dominate all aspects of life, leaving individuals feeling trapped and hopeless.

The Breaking Point and Decision to Seek Help:

At age 32, facing severe physical and emotional health problems and the potential loss of her partner, Mary Beth reached a breaking point. It wasn’t a dramatic event like in movies, but rather the cumulative toll of years of addiction, trauma, and personal loss. She felt trapped and debilitated, but this led her to make the critical decision to seek help through rehab. This moment shows that recovery often begins not with certainty but with the decision to try, even when the future feels uncertain.

The Journey to Recovery:

Mary Beth’s recovery was a gradual process. She entered a long-term rehab program, staying for five months and facing setbacks along the way, including using drugs during her first months of recovery. However, she learned that progress doesn’t have to be perfect. With peer support and a strong willingness to improve, Mary Beth began to reclaim her life. The support of others in recovery, seeing them succeed, helped her believe that recovery was possible for her too. Her story illustrates that recovery is not linear and that small steps toward change can lead to lasting transformation.

The Role of Therapy and Peer Support:

Mary Beth’s path to healing also involved addressing the trauma that underpinned her addiction. After rehab, she sought therapy to confront her complex PTSD and severe anxiety, recognizing that tackling both her trauma and addiction was crucial for long-term recovery. Peer support played a significant role in her journey, as she connected with others who had gone through similar struggles. Whether through 12-step programs or other recovery networks, seeing people overcome their addiction and trauma inspired her and reinforced the importance of community in the recovery process.

The Power of Family Support:

A key element in Mary Beth’s recovery was the unwavering support of her partner. Despite the chaos of her addiction, her partner provided stability, showing her patience and belief in her ability to recover. His support, including removing alcohol from their home, helped create an environment conducive to healing. Mary Beth’s recovery was also bolstered by the understanding that having supportive friends and family significantly increases the chances of success. Her story highlights that recovery isn’t just about individual effort but also about the people around you who believe in your potential.

Overcoming Setbacks and Achieving Success:

Mary Beth’s journey from addiction to becoming a federal court judge is a testament to her resilience and determination. After getting sober at 32, she worked incrementally toward her goals, going to law school at 39, becoming a lawyer at 42, and achieving her ultimate dream of becoming a federal judge at 53. Her story demonstrates that success is not a straight path but one built on gradual, consistent effort. She emphasizes that even with a “bad” or “embarrassing” past, one can achieve great things with perseverance and commitment to personal growth.

The Importance of Incremental Steps in Achieving Goals:

Mary Beth advocates for focusing on small, incremental steps when pursuing big goals. After her recovery, she wanted to make up for lost time but understood that success wasn’t immediate. She stresses the importance of assessing where you are and determining the first step to take toward your long-term goals. This mindset, focusing on one step at a time, allowed her to rebuild her life, even when the bigger picture seemed daunting. She encourages women to take actionable steps toward their dreams, knowing that every step forward counts, no matter how small.

Never Too Late to Make a Change:

Mary Beth’s final message is that it’s never too late to turn your life around. She became a lawyer at 42, a judge at 53, and a published author at 59, showing that with dedication and the right mindset, it’s possible to reinvent yourself at any stage of life. Her story reinforces the idea that aging with purpose is about continuous reinvention and finding meaning in each phase of life. No matter how difficult the past may be, it’s possible to overcome obstacles and achieve new milestones, demonstrating the limitless potential for growth, regardless of age.

Connect with Mary Beth O’Connor

Connect with Bev:

Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/womenover50rock

https://www.linkedin.com/in/beverleyglazer/

Need advice? Schedule a time to talk: https://calendly.com/reinventimpossible/15min